Terrible “Camping Hacks” With Troom Troom
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Terrible “Camping Hacks” With Troom Troom

Troom Troom: Let’s make a portable campfire out of
what we have. We can light up a marker or- Eros: You’re in a goddamn forest. We have
flammable things all around us, but let’s use this sharpie I was sniffing five
minutes ago. Wheeee! It’s not even like they were using flint
and steel to light, they have a frickin’ lighter. Welcome back everyone,
I’m Eros Mandex and today we’re gonna try something a little more intense.
We’re gonna be taking a look at Troom Troom who has 14 million
subscribers and review a few of their DIY camping “hacks” and “pranks” because
much like 5-Minute Crafts and other content farms and such, oh
some of them are just bullshit. So without further ado, without further
introduction, let’s begin this bullshit. Troom: Surviving in the wild is difficult, but
out here all you have to be afraid of are pranks. Eros: All you have to be afraid of
is pranks when there’s also hacks in here. Hmm… Troom: Why is Miss Smith sneaking around?
Eros: The tree didn’t even hide her. Troom: She wants to leave a giant Yeti footprint and prank the girls.
Eros: Worst ninja ever. Troom: Outline a big Yeti foot on
parchment paper. Apply a layer of hot glue and color it
with acrylic paint. Take the print off parchment paper like this. A footprint in
the mud is perfect.
Eros: What’s the point of th- why do you paint it? The hot glue, it
stands up by itself. Like, there’s no need for the paint. And you know what’s easier
to make a big foot than hot gluing paper? You go to the
store, you buy a big piece of foam, and then you just cut the foot out of the
foam. It takes like 5 minutes, if that. It’s probably a shitload less work and it yields the same exact results. Troom: Ah! A snowman, oh no. Eros: A snowman. In the middle of June. I mean, ok, don’t get me wrong. If it was June, sunny, 80 degrees out and I saw fucking snowman, I might be a little
scared too. It would send shivers down my spine more likely than not. However,
another kind of fucked-up part about this part is like, it’s grown-ass adults
focusing on scaring children. I’m presuming the actresses are trying to be
children or something like that in this universe but, hmm. I dunno. Maybe I’m just being a little too picky. Troom: We finally stop. Work, girls. Set up the tent. Unfortunately, we’re not alone her. Every
mosquito in the world is here, too. Ah! They’re biting me. Calm down. Miss Smith
knows a tried-and-tested method. Eros: Oh no. It’s gonna be like some essential oil bullshit. Troom: Cover dried cloves & a spoonfull of vanilla sugar with hot water. Let it sit for half an hour. Eros: So you make a sticky mixture.
Troom: Pour it into a small bottle. Eros: First off, they’re using a spoon to scoop it into the bottle. Folks,
if you have a small ass bottle and you want to transport that liquid from a
bowl to the bottle this is newfangled invention out there called a funnel.
That and also, you know what’s easier than waiting 30 minutes? Taking your happy
ass to Walmart, paying a dollar or two for bug spray, and not only do you have
something that actually fucking works, but it’s not going to leave
sticky residue all over you that probably will attract ants while you
sleep. Troom: -fabric.
Eros: Okay, first up we sew a bag. We don’t just use a bag of have in the room. We have to sew
one. Reduce, reuse, recycle. Troom: Turn it right-side out.
Eros: We turn right-side out.
Okay, I’m tracking. I’m tracking. Troom: Mix equal amounts of dried herbs. You need sage, chamomile, and marigold. Put them into the bag. Eros: That sounds more like tea than
something that’s gonna keep a frickin’ mosquito away. Troom: And sew it shut. Eros: Then again,
sage makes a shitty tea. Don’t put it tea, folks. Troom: This herb sachet will scare
all the mosquitoes away. Troom: The fire went out! Eros: Because you only used
paper! Troom: What about our marshmallows? Let’s make a portable campfire out of what we
have. We can light up a marker or- Eros: Ah man. This one actually kind of makes me mad for the main reason of, you’re in a goddamn forest. We have flammable things ALL
around us, but let’s use this sharpie I was sniffing five minutes ago. Wheee! It’s not even like they were using flint and steel to light. They have a frickin’
lighter. “Ah, the fire went out!” “Oh, let’s just light this goddamn marker.” Ugh, people
like this… people like this shouldn’t go camping. If you think lighting a marker
is a better alternative than collecting a few sticks and putting it in the
fireplace stay the fuck out of my forests, please. I beg of thee.
Troom: -a crayon. An alcohol-based marker burns very well. Eros: It’s an alcohol-based marker.
Meaning it’s going to release all types of toxic fumes into your marshmallow for
you to enjoy and probably get cancer from. Troom: Even better than a wax crayon but Miss-
Eros: They were going to use a fucking crayon if not for that one. Like, *sigh* I just wish
I could be in the conference room for this conversation of: “I got a hack for
fire, folks! We light a marker on fire, but we also suggest you could use a
crayon!” No. Even though it’s too dangerous, you
know damn well there’s gonna be some youngster going like,
“I have a fire hack. Yay! And then while they’re wandering through the forest, high off
Sharpie fumes that were burning, Troom Troom, you will be to blame. Troom: What tasty and
healthy dish can you cook on a grill? Eros: Steaks. Troom: Oatmeal and apples. Cut the tops off apples. Remove the core. Put in oats. Add a piece of brown sugar
and raisins. Cover it with the top, and wrap it in foil.
Eros: I actually like this idea.
Troom: Oh! It’s hot! Eros: You just picked it outta the fuckin’ fire. The camp counselor is like, “I’m gonna pick this apple out of the fire and
expect NOT to get burned! Troom: The smell is amazing! The oatmeal is soaked with apple juice. Eros: I like how she just looks around like, “I’m about to do something sketchy,” and then
takes a bite out of the apple. Like, were you not going to eat the apple? Like, I
don’t know about you but when I get things like a bread bowl, I eat the bowl.
That’s the whole reason you get that. Troom: Miss Smith has a secret recipe. It’s a fried egg in a tomato. Eros: Can we just take a moment to just pause this right here? While we get a gooood look at the egg. Alright, just look how much that
jiggles. Troom: Yummy! Eros: That’s undercooked as fuck. You’re gonna get sick. You’re gonna be squirting shit all over the forest. You’re gonna be
just having a bad time if you eat that egg. Like, I hope you brought some sort
of toilet paper cause chances are, if you’re Miss Smith’s level of
intelligence with forests, you’re gonna go take a dump and accidentally wipe with
poison oak or something like that. Which, I don’t know about you, but that
sounds like a horrid experience. Troom: Tea time! Ew, it’s bitter. Here, take some sugar. Eros: Ah! The tea is too bitter. Oh no. Troom: Paint ants on pieces of sugar using black food coloring. Eros: Oh, that’s us too much work. You’re just better off getting real ants. Hahaha Ruin that fuckin’ sugar. Have them be
pissed as shit at you. Haha That’s a prank that’s worth it, because you get to laugh
the entire time while everybody drinks bitter-ass tea, and you’re like, “mm, you’re
bitter. Just like your tea.” Troom: Protecting yourself from the sun is super important. Miss Smith is a teacher, even when she’s camping. Nothing is better than Elmer’s glue.
Pour the sunscreen into the empty glue bottle. Eros: All right. I’m gonna go on
record here as saying, if some motherfucker let me put Elmer’s glue on me instead of
sunscreen and let me go about my day without telling me
and I got burnt- my fair skin just got fried as if I was a goddamn Lobster, oh, oh
they’re taking a tumble down the next hill I see. Troom: It looks like we’re lost. We
have a trick for everyone who doesn’t know the way back. Fill a lid with water. Rub a needle on synthetic fabric. Put a
leaf onto water and place the needle on top. The point of the needle shows the
direction. Our homemade compass worked. Now we know for sure where we need to go.
Eros: Just by a compass for like 2 bucks at your local store. I mean, at the end of the
day, just be prepared when you go camping. Ah, Troom Troom. You content farm. This
video that has 1 million three hundred eighty thousand views, so they made
well over a thousand dollars off this video. You know what, I’m gonna take
solace in that they’re not as bad as 5-Minute Crafts when it comes to bullshit.
That’s all I gotta say about that. That being said, let me know what you guys thought
about this content. I’m trying something a little new. If you guys want me to do more content like this, comment on down below. If you guys like my channel in general, click
Subscribe, click Like. Drop a comment on down below just to say hi. Anyways,
thank you very much guys. I hope you guys enjoyed it. As always, I
hope you guys have a good day, I hope you guys have a good night, I hope you guys
have a wonderful whatever it is decide to have, and I hope to see y’all next
time. Yummy!…


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